Who's Brilliant Idea Was That?

Children are gifts from God. I believe this to be true with every fiber of my being. When it comes to their toys, however, I find myself unable to reconcile myself to this point of view.

Children's toys are always brightly colored and more and more they seem to come with all sorts of moving parts and sound effects. As entertaining as these moving parts and sounds may seem to a child, they are a source of never ending irritation for the parent of that child.

I used to blame the individuals who purchased these toys for the child, however, lately I find myself leaning more towards placing the blame on whatever manufacturer decided that it would be a good idea to make a toy that only has one volume (loud) and one setting (on) and then decided that it would be really cool to make that toy a motion activated one.

I refuse to believe that these manufacturers have children because I cannot fathom how any parent would willingly dispense such a terrible weapon upon a fellow parent. When a child's toy starts playing The Itsy Bitsy Spider at full volume in the middle of prayer service, or Twinkle Twinkle Little Star begins blaring incessantly during Grandmothers funeral service, it is more than enough to make any new mother want to sink through the floor in utter shame.

So while I do not see much chance of any relief from the obnoxiously loud, wiggling, rattling, motion activated toys, I encourage young parents everywhere to take heart and rest easy because there is a special circle of hell reserved for the inventors, manufacturers and distributors of these toys. A circle that is surrounded by brightly colored, cheerfully singing, life size toys.